Current Weight is 262.2 lbs
Previous Weight was 269.8 lbs
I lost an impressive 7.6 lbs this week I was aiming for 3.4 lbs. I worked out 6 days last week and burned an average of 2000 calories per day in exercise. Consumed an average of 1300 – 1700 calories per day.
Last week I spoke a lot about some of my struggles with food as a means of coping with stress and depression. But one thing that I didn’t talk about out of fear was that ultimately it wasn’t the work stress that triggered my binge but rather the feeling of loneliness. I’ve been single for several years now partly because of how my last relationship ended (i.e. trust issues, lack of confidence, etc). But also because I felt that I did not deserve to be loved. It was these feelings that re-surfaced that flipped my world upside down. I was craving that hug to make me feel loved. I was craving that voice that would tell me that everything would work out. Instead I ate junk in an attempt to fill the void which we all know it never does.
I confided in my friend Sandra about the root cause of my weight gain and she helped me realize something that I’d been blind to all of these years. Below is the advice she gave to me.
The only way through it is just what you’re working on doing and what [I’m] try to do, which is to live life fully in other ways. I figure at some point those other ways will introduce me to a relationship. But if they don’t, I really strive to be happy without it and mostly succeed. You will too in either case (not just a platitude). I figure, too, that the more I work on myself, the happier I’ll be if/when the right person comes around. We have to be ready for it so that we don’t repeat past issues and striving to be happy in other areas I think makes us ready. If we’re already fulfilled, then a relationship is just a huge bonus.
The key in all this for me was that I need to live a fulfilled life so that I might have something worth sharing. She helped me find a new focus and as you can tell from this weeks update I’m back on track. I’m very lucky to have someone as wise as Sandra in my life.
Goal for this week is to consume no more than 1728 calories per day. Burn an average of 1011 calories per day in exercise over 6 day period. Weight loss goal is to lose 3.2 lbs.